The de-mystification of PTSD
Many people living with PTSD or working within a medical setting do not really understand the process going on inside the person experiencing a PTSD flashback - here's to enlightenment... I asked a creative genius to make a whiteboard animation to help de-mystify what everyone else thinks is a toddler temper tantrum... I have also supplied the transcript for the video AND further down this page we have included full text versions of what it is like having a flashback and also how to help in a medical setting...
Video Transcription
What a PTSD Flashback Is Like and How to Help
When someone is in a PTSD flashback, they usually do not know it is happening…
- From the outside, they may look normal. Same face. Same voice. They might even answer questions. But inside, their brain and body believe they are in immediate danger.
- They are not remembering the trauma. They are reliving it as if it is happening right now. It feels like they are fighting for their life.
- That is why normal, well meant questions like Are you okay, Can you tell me what is wrong, or Would you like a drink can feel confusing or overwhelming.
- If voices become louder or frustrated, the brain experiences that as more danger. The flashback becomes stronger and harder to come out of.
- What may look like anger or childish behaviour is often fear and self protection.
- This is not a choice. It is a survival response.
- What helps most is simple. Calm voices. Gentle behaviour. Patience. And reassurance like You are safe right now.
- When the inside feels life threatening, the outside must feel safe.
- Because trauma is not only about what happened. It is also about what was missing. Safety, care, and love.
What a PTSD Flashback Is Like
— and How to Help
When I’m in a PTSD flashback, I usually don’t know that I’m in one. From the outside, I may look the same — same face, same voice, sometimes even answering questions. Because of that, it can seem like I’m present and thinking clearly. I’m not. Inside, my brain and body believe I’m in immediate danger. It feels like I’m fighting for my life.
Why This Is Hard to Understand…
While this is happening inside me, people may ask normal, well-meaning questions:
- “Are you okay?”
- “Do you want a drink?”
- “Can you tell me what’s wrong?”
- “Would you like food or tea?”
These questions are kind and reasonable — but to someone in a flashback, they don’t make sense.
Imagine you’re fighting for your life, and someone asks what kind of coffee you want. That’s what it feels like.
So if I respond sharply, emotionally, or in a way that seems childish or out of proportion, it’s not because I’m being difficult. It’s because I’m responding from a place of survival, not choice or logic.
Why Anger or Shouting Makes Things Worse
If someone becomes frustrated, raises their voice, or shouts, my brain experiences that as more danger. At that point, the person in front of me can feel like they’re joining the threat rather than helping me escape it. This makes the flashback stronger and harder to come out of.
What may look like aggression or a “tantrum” is often fear and self-protection.
A Common Misunderstanding
What people sometimes describe as “acting like a toddler” isn’t immaturity or bad behaviour. It’s a nervous system overwhelmed by trauma and no longer able to think, explain, or regulate emotions normally. This is not a choice.
What Actually Helps
Trauma is not just about what happened — it’s also about what was missing at the time: safety, care, reassurance, and love.
So during a flashback, what helps most is:
- calm voices
- gentle behaviour
- patience
- reassurance of safety (“You’re safe right now”)
- kindness and compassion
What doesn’t Help
- shouting
- arguing
- pushing for answers
- giving lots of choices
- telling me to “calm down”
When the world inside feels life-threatening, the world outside needs to feel safe.
In short:
All you need is love — because love is the one thing trauma never had.
Understanding PTSD Flashbacks in Medical & Emergency Settings
When a person is in a PTSD flashback, they usually do not know they are in one.
From the outside, they may look present:
- same face
- same voice
- may answer questions
This can be misleading.
What Is Actually Happening
Internally, the person’s nervous system believes they are in immediate, life-threatening danger.
They are not “remembering” the trauma — their brain and body are re-experiencing it as if it is happening now.
In simple terms:
they are fighting for their life inside.
Why Standard Questions May Escalate Distress
While this internal emergency is happening, staff may ask normal, well-intended questions such as:
- “Are you okay?”
- “Can you answer these questions?”
- “Would you like a drink?”
- “Can you calm down?”
To someone in a flashback, these questions can feel irrelevant, confusing, or overwhelming — similar to asking someone their food preference while they believe they are about to die.
Responses may seem:
- emotionally disproportionate
- childlike
- oppositional
- confused or inconsistent
This is not behavioural non-compliance.
It is a survival response.
Why Raised Voices or Anger Make Things Worse
If staff raise their voice, appear frustrated, or take a controlling or confrontational tone, the person’s brain may interpret this as an additional threat.
At that point:
- staff may be perceived as part of the danger
- distress and defensive reactions escalate rapidly
What looks like agitation or aggression is often fear-based defence, not intent to harm.
Common Misinterpretation
What is sometimes labelled as “regression,” “attention-seeking,” or “a tantrum” is actually a trauma-activated nervous system that has lost access to reasoning and social regulation.
This is not immaturity.
This is not deliberate behaviour.
This is physiology.
What Helps in the Moment
The goal is nervous system safety, not explanation or logic.
Helpful responses include:
- calm, slow speech
- neutral, non-threatening body language
- minimal questioning
- reassurance of safety (“You’re safe right now”)
- grounding statements (“You’re in hospital. It’s [date/time]. I’m here to help.”)
- patience and emotional containment
Avoid:
- shouting
- arguing
- rapid questioning
- commands without explanation
- interpreting distress as defiance
Key Point for Emergency Care
Trauma is defined not only by what happened, but by the absence of care and safety when it happened.
During a flashback, the most effective intervention is not control — it is calm presence.
When the internal world feels life-threatening, the external world must feel safe.
ALL YOU NEED IS LOVE